Wedding vows

7 LGBTQIA + couples share their real wedding vows

Ryan and Sumi: new traditions

Photo by Andreas & Nico


In the midst of the pandemic, Ryan and Sumi got married to their mini-money in their backyard, so it seemed like the perfect opportunity to recite their own vows. “Being a same-sex couple and with the pandemic raging, this seemed like a good time to create our own traditions,” says Ryan. The couple also agreed that traditional wedding vows don’t translate into their relationship.

Long before the wedding, Ryan would type notes into his phone whenever he thought of a wish, and he would finalize the list right before the ceremony. On the other hand, Sumi decided to think through his list in one sitting, and he made sure to catch the words themselves in addition to the emotional element. “I sat down with a glass of wine and walked back to the past,” Sumi admits. “Then I wrote down everything I was feeling at the time. ”

Ryan: “First of all, it’s a chip, so we can discuss it later, but everyone knows I’m in chip form. When I started to write this, the only word that came to mind was “improbable”. Because like you said, you’re from Texas, I’m from Manila. You talk so lovingly about how you drove your Maxima, I failed my license test and still cannot drive. But, we’re both really the same in the sense that we knew we were different. We left our homes and our families to come to New York because there is a dream that we wanted to pursue, and there we created a family of friends, and we also sailed this crazy dating scene. And somehow we met at Anfora in the West Village, and like you said, we were inseparable. We have found a way.

Despite everything throughout this year, we are now celebrating here in the Hamptons and online. The last few months have been crazy because nothing has been the same, not just for us but for everyone. I still remember when you looked at me when I came home with bags and bags of supplies, thinking the world was going to end, and then all of a sudden some of the supplies we had to use. I like it when you joke when we are dining out and an MTA bus is passing right by us and you say, “dine al fresco”. And I’ll never forget walking the depths of what was going on when we walked into Soho and it was just us.

Fast forward, and we are now surrounded here and across borders by joy, celebrating crazy and crazy times. And I think about the crazy times, not in the way we’ve been through them or how painful they are, but that’s when we really knew we were meant to be together because if we can. to cross is meant to be. Once again, I say to myself: we have found a way.

I look at my grandparents, our families and our friends, and I make this promise that I will be your best friend, your fiercest protector and your husband. You and I finding each other seems so unlikely, but to watch you now about to be my one and only, the unlikely really seems possible to me. We found a way because at the end of the day I believe and have faith that love always finds a way.

Sumi: “Ryan, from the moment we met we’ve been inseparable. Our first date was on a Wednesday. Then we saw each other again Friday, then Sunday and until Monday. There is a bond between us that I can’t explain. And three years later that connection has only gotten stronger. When I’m with you, I feel like a lost puzzle piece that has finally found its home. With you, I just belong .

I cannot say if it was by chance or by chance that we met. But one day you – a Filipino from LA – and I – an Indian from Texas – slipped the same way on the same app and found each other and stumbled across each other’s lives. There were no fireworks. No angel came down from heaven to light our way, but from the moment we met our lives were changed forever.

Today, as we go from roommates and best friends to life partners and husbands, I just want to tell you that you are my whole world. You are my chosen family, my better half and my home. It is my absolute privilege to be able to walk by your side for the rest of this day. And I want to spend our journey together, to prove every step of the way that I am worthy of your love. I love you forever.”


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