Wedding vows

7 Ways to Include Children in Your Wedding Vows That Will Have Everyone Looking for Handkerchiefs

Weddings are wonderful places to start, but they take on added meaning when the couple have children together or have previous relationships. For them, the day is not just about becoming spouses; it’s about becoming a family. With that in mind, many couples may want to include their children in their wedding vows as part of the ceremony.

There are many other ways to bring children into a wedding, of course: bring them into the wedding; give them special tasks such as keeping the guest book or helping guests find their table at the reception; make a parent / child dance to a favorite song; let them make a speech. But making it part of the vows is an even more meaningful gesture. It affirms the parents’ commitment to the family, whether incorporated or blended, and in many cases, allows children to do the same. In the case of blended families, it can also help alleviate any insecurities children might have about new in-laws and their place in the new household. And for vow renewals, he recognizes the role children have and will continue to play in marriage.

Below are some of the sweetest suggestions for wishes that include a couple’s children. If you choose to use one of these, make sure you have extra handkerchiefs on hand during the ceremony; between you and your guests, it is the guarantee that there will be no dry eyes in the place.


Write the children in your own wishes

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It is a good option for couples with a baby or a very young child who cannot really participate in the marriage. Mention your child’s name in your greetings and declare your promise to raise them with love and joy.


Have separate wishes for the children

Frank Harlan, a wedding officiant interviewed by Offbeat Bride, offered his stepfamily wishing ritual: After the couple say a few words of love to each child, the whole family swears to love and love each other. respect. Then children make three promises to the family, usually written by parents. They can be serious (“Do you promise to be the best person you can be?”), Funny (“Do you promise not to put the orange juice back in the fridge if it’s empty?”), Or a bit of of them.


Give them jewelry

Couples wear rings as a symbol of their commitment, so why not include children in the tradition? After the rings are blessed and exchanged, you can give each child a pendant, bracelet, pin, or other piece of jewelry with a meaningful design or message. The family medallion was created especially for blended families, and the design – three linked circles – represents both parents and their children. Or opt for a bespoke piece like this bracelet from Etsy, which includes two records saying: “I love you” and “Your daddy made us a family, you made us friends”.


Include a family unity candle

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As The Knot explained, the unity candle ceremony at weddings represents the union of the two families. Typically, the mothers of the bride and groom light individual candles, which the couple then use to light a larger candle in the center. For a wedding with children, you can change the tradition by giving each child a candle to be lit by the parents (with supervision for the little ones, of course), then having everyone light the candle in the center pillar. Etsy offers a wide variety of family unity candle sets, many of which can be personalized with each person’s name.

Other (less flammable) options include having each child place a flower in a vase to make a bouquet, or make a sand vase with each family member pouring a different color of sand.


Let them write your vows

If the children are old enough, you can invite them to either help you write your vows or let them do all the work themselves. Talk to them about the meaning of vows and promises that they think are important for a couple with children. (You’ll probably want to review the finished product before the wedding, just to make sure you’re not asked to promise never to tell your stepchildren to clean their rooms.)


Acknowledge their feelings

Florida wedding planner Weddings by Christina wisely acknowledged that children entering stepfamilies may feel conflicted or reluctant to participate in marriage. Her advice: don’t force or buy a child to participate if they don’t want to; instead, ask the step-parent to underline in the wishes that he will love them, honor them, and encourage their dreams. If the child is from a first marriage that involved abuse or neglect, the step-parent might swear, “I promise to provide a safe, loving and supportive home for you and your (parent).


Include special references to your family

If you and the kids have any favorite books, movies, or other references that bring you closer to each other, you can incorporate them into the greetings for an even more personal touch. For example: “Devyn and I are definitely Ravenclaws, and you and Alana are Gryffindors, but together our two houses stand up to any dark forces that might present themselves!” “

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